Wednesday, July 29, 2009

AM Thoughts

So here we are again, it's early AM and I can't sleep. However there is a nice thunderstorm taking place outside so the background music is quite soothing, and Sam and I are holding down the cough. This week has been very interesting and mentally draining, however Megan and I went and met with Brian, Tina, Bree, and Spencer this evening at Aspen, it was a blast. Maybe the Mondo Granita is why I am still awake?.....probably should have considered that. 

I am really looking forward to Friday night, I believe God is given me a very special privilege and
I am looking forward to the experience. I believe heavily that change is on the horizon for Megan and I. I am anticipating some news to arrive very soon that will change things up for me a little bit and hopefully satisfy her as well. 

I am praying tonight for patience, understanding and "Horton" sized faith. Heavenly God you have never left me alone and I know you will never leave me in the future. Thank you for loving me. 

Jeff and Deanna are on my mind this evening. I hope things are going well for them in wintery Africa today. Well I am going to wrap this post up and try to get some sleep. Good Night

Sunday, July 26, 2009

Round n Round

So, I am having one of those nights you know when you place your head on the pillow and all of a sudden your mind is like a "slips" race from "The Fast and the Furious" minus Paul Walker and Vin Diesel. I just can't seem to get my mind to slow down enough in order to drift off into a nice deep sleep. I guess I do have a lot on my mind lately. 

Lately it seems like my faith in God, the one who created me, the one who gave his son for me, has been very much tested. I know God is there for me, I know that he has the best plan for me. But why is it so difficult to just simply live that. I am so tired of where I am in my life, outside of my beautiful bride and the love I have for her, I am so dead in life otherwise. Sometimes I think that is simply my fault, am I trying to ask too much too often? 

More times than not I feel like Denise from "The Cosby Show" always analyzing who I am and what I want to do with my life. Typically ending in something to do with helping other people in other countries. But why would God use me to do something like that when I can't even trust him completely now. 

So I decided to break up the lack off sleep by reading from Colossians 3. Paul is telling the church at Colosse that new life in Christ requires a higher standard of living. However in verse 15 it reads "And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are all called to live in peace. And always be thankful"

Thank you father for your constant reminders that life in you is eternal and knowing you provide peace is sufficient enough. Thank you for not making everything so simple, thank you for struggle, for making us better. We love you and are thankful. 

So now as I try to get some sleep, I will continue to pray for my anxiousness but most of all I know I have peace in Christ Jesus.

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Next Please

So lately I have been very hesitant to get back on here and write something. My thought process lately has been very selfish and geared towards Megan and I's future. I have constantly been going to God for direction. I have such strong ambitions to work with those in need and lead people to Christ. I think so easily sometimes I tend to put God in a box and place limitations on his abilities and powers, which I think is very easy to do considering we as humans are only capable of few things. When God is capable of everything.

So why is it that I constantly wonder why God has me in a "holding tank". Why can't I just trust that he is doing something and preparing me for the next step. Does my mind not stretch that far? I strongly encourage anyone who ever might read these postings, If you are a Christ follower or not, I challenge you to stop for a moment think about the steps and phases of your life as much in detail as you can. Start writting down those details, as you go back over the details of your life I promise you will notice how each phase and step will amaze you as to how you got where you are.....if you are struggling with something maybe the steps of your life slowly led you down a dark street. Or maybe you have never been happier, and the steps of your life that you have chosen have blessed you beyond your imagination.

It is mind blowing how God strategically guides each one of us with the choices that are presented to us. One of my favorite things about our God is the fact that he enjoys it when we challenge him, thats right the God of the universe enjoys friendly challenges from his children. So I recommend that if you are a "prayer warrior" and you need a little change to your script. Challenge God with a particular area of your life, if you are anxious to find a new job and have been praying and praying for God to present you a new job.....maybe you need to dig deeper with your prayer maybe you should tell God that you need a job and are prepared to follow him wherever. Or maybe if you have been praying for a friend to come to know Christ and it just doesn't seem to be working out. Well maybe you should tell God that you are going to witness to that friend and you need him to give you the words to say.......I promise once you "kick it up a notch" in your prayer life you will start seeing changes.

Ok, so back to my orignal point...I tend to go off on tangents. If you are like me and are extremely impatient, give God your thoughts. Take some time to challenge him in your prayer life. And if you are not a follower and don't prayer that often.......maybe give it a shot, what do you have to lose. I will be doing my best to rely on God's perfect plan......and not force myself into it.